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notalwaysright_feed
Me: "The terminal for scanning the scratch cards is down until a manager arrives in about half an hour."
Customer: *Demanding rudely,* "I want my winnings."
Me: "You can have your money, but we literally cannot scan to check if it’s a winner, so you should come back in thirty minutes."
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ru_strugackienotalwaysright_feedRead That’s Some Forked Up Theology
Me: "Do you need me to put that in the trash for you?"
Customer: "Uh, no, I was just returning these."
She opens the napkin to reveal our store's plastic sporks. Like, all of them. I quickly glance over to our utensil station to see that the spork section is indeed empty.
Me: "Uh, why did you take all the sporks?"
notalwaysright_feedRead Harboring Confusion 200 Years Of Confusion
I worked on Sydney Harbour cruises back in 1988, Australia's Bicentennial Year. I had a boat full of USA tourists who were absolutely polite, kind, and tipped well. But one did ask:
Tourist: "How often do you have these Bicentennials? They're really neat!"
notalwaysright_feedRead When Annual Has Been Annulled
Coworker #1: "Help yourselves, everyone! It’s my birthday today."
A few coworkers cheer and say "happy birthday, but [Coworker #2] is looking confused. She's a relatively new part-time hire and still in high school.
Coworker #2: "Wait… it can’t be your birthday. You had one last year."
notalwaysright_feedRead Seat Dreams Are Made Of This
Now my eldest was already taller than me, my youngest, on the other hand, was at the time not so tall. This meant that when the concert started and the people in the row in front decided to stay standing, he could not see past them, only catching glimpses of the stage between their bodies.
notalwaysright_feedRead Nailed The Answer
Customer: "What time do you close?"
Me: "6.30 PM."
Customer: "I'm just leaving from [Neighbouring Town]. Will you still be open when I get there?"
Me: "Well, if you get here before 6.30 PM, then yes."
Read Nailed The Answer
notalwaysright_feedRead Cry And Punishment
I’ll admit, I can have RBF at times, especially when I don’t have the energy to mask. As we were standing there watching everyone, this guy leaving tells me something like:
Guy: "Smile more, it could be worse."
Read Cry And Punishment
notalwaysright_feed
When I was little, my mum was not afraid of dealing out a smack when I was acting up (yes, yes, I know, child abuse and all that – different times). As I got older, I approached her size rather rapidly. So, instead, she'd just raise her hand like she was about to smack me, knowing full well that a smack would have no physical effect, so the raised hand was an indicator to stop doing whatever stupid s*** I was doing.
notalwaysright_feed
Game Master: "Ah, you must be [My Name]. Welcome. Before I introduce us, let me ask you a question."
Me: "Uhm... okay..."
Game Master: "How do you feel about [Absolutely offensive, illegal, and awful subject]?"
Me: *Deadpan.* "I think it's hilarious."
notalwaysright_feedRead This Wheely Sounds Pandering
As I'm ringing up a woman, she smiles at me and says:
Customer: "You’re such an inspiration!"
I pause, give her a polite nod, and finish the transaction.
notalwaysright_feedWhen I was in 9th grade my American History teacher taught differently than most history teachers. He didn’t just teach about dry dates and dead boring people, he tried to get us to understand regular people and how they lived. He was my favorite history teacher ever. At one point during the year he had […]
notalwaysright_feedRead When A Wrong Turn Turns Right
It was towards the start of the academic year, and the particular subject was animal ethics and welfare. We were being introduced to a lecture about how welfare has changed over the year when a girl walked into the hall, apologised for being late, and found a seat.
notalwaysright_feed(When I am very little, I live for a time with my grandparents. We have a neighbor in the building, my grandparents’ age, who I learn has recently become a widower. ) Me: “Grandma, what happened to Mr. [Neighbor]’s wife?” Grandma: “Well, hmm, you see, [My Name], it was discovered she had a tumor – […]
notalwaysright_feed8 years ago my niece, then 2 1/2 years old, was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia. She was treated at a major children’s hospital in the north of England and they were wonderful through the entire time, I was expecting efficiency but the warmth and caring of the staff was just amazing. My niece loved […]
notalwaysright_feedMy cousin was staying the night at our Nana’s before a dance recital. She had apparently forgotten her acne treatment and begged her mom to go back to the house for it. (They live about fifteen minutes away.) Right as she leaves, my aunt says “You’re a spoiled rotten brat.” I was tempted to say […]
silent_gluk posting in ru_strugackienotalwaysright_feedRead The Manager Is A Sauce To Be Reckoned With
Customer: "Oh, and can I get a LOT of extra sauce?"
Coworker: "Um..." *She's new.* "I have to charge for additional sauces."
Customer: "What?! Okay, fine, how much are they?"
Coworker: *Keys one into the register to see.* "29 cents each."
Customer: "FOR SAUCES?!"
notalwaysright_feed - No One Is A Winner Heresilent_gluk in ru_strugackie - Цурэновский сонетnotalwaysright_feed - That’s Some Forked Up Theologynotalwaysright_feed - Harboring Confusion 200 Years Of Confusionnotalwaysright_feed - When Annual Has Been Annullednotalwaysright_feed - Seat Dreams Are Made Of Thisnotalwaysright_feed - Nailed The Answernotalwaysright_feed - Cry And Punishmentnotalwaysright_feed - Is That Humor Slapstick?notalwaysright_feed - Critical Hit On Offensenotalwaysright_feed - This Wheely Sounds Panderingnotalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - When A Wrong Turn Turns Rightnotalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)notalwaysright_feed - (no subject)silent_gluk in ru_strugackie - Любопытно...notalwaysright_feed - The Manager Is A Sauce To Be Reckoned Withtimeasmymeasure
